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By Abbie Smith, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services
 I usually write about issues directly connected to behavior, which relates to a child’s ability to regulate their emotions. I came across the article below and wanted to share it in its entirety with you. Ms. Elleseff’s article is full of fun activities parents can do with their children. In January, she graciously gave her verbal permission to reprint this article for Holt’s families. Enjoy!
Speech-Language Strategies for Multisensory Stimulation of Internationally Adopted Children
By: Tatyana Elleseff MA CCC-SLP Date Posted: 2012-01-11
This article was first published in January 2012 Issue of Adoption Today Magazine (pp. 40-43).
Recently, I participated in a professional adoption email discussion regarding developmental stimulation of infants and toddlers in orphanages and it got me thinking about not just the importance of stimulation for institutionalized children but also about stimulation activities for post-institutionalized children. Orphanages have long been infamous for sensory deprivation as well as a host of other adversities. Even one month spent Continue reading Speech-Language Strategies for Internationally Adopted Children
By Sunday Silver, MA, Director of Post Adoption Services
Snack, Play, Love
The Connection Between Nutrition and Your Child’s Behavior
Join Dr. Karyn Purvis as she discusses the most recent research on the impact nutrition can have on behavior. She will examine the effects certain foods may have and how small changes in diet can make a big impact on how your child feels and therefore behaves. [...]
By Abbie Smith, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services
The holidays are rife with potential opportunities for parents and kids to get over stimulated and temporarily lose the ability to keep their emotions regulated. Routines are non-existent, meal schedules often get disrupted and everyone’s blood sugar goes down. Just think of all the pressure leading up to school letting out: plays and performances, finishing school projects, too many parties, gifts for teachers and gifts for friends; And this is just for the children. Parents have additional pressures: budgeting for gifts, big meals, shopping for everyone, wrapping presents and mailing presents, cards to get out, office parties and office presents, packing everyone up and traveling to relatives, and all that rich food around — and many more I haven’t listed! It takes being proactive to plan for all of this and keep your equilibrium at the same time. It is very important for parents to take care of themselves and be able to stay within their own window of tolerance during this busy time. When you are present and calm, then you can help your child to calm down. Kids often take their emotional cues from their parents and are very sensitive to the emotional health of their parents. Some therapists say that a child can only be as calm as their parent. Also, there is some new research that shows that when a parent has a very stressful day and has difficulty remaining regulated, the next day the kids have a bad day.
 Our kids who have been home less than two years or who were raised in orphanages their first three years, have stress systems much less developed than their typically developing peers. They are very prone to revert to Continue reading Emotional Regulation: Holiday Tips
By Abbie Smith, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services
 Most of you have probably heard about the left-brain, right-brain concept, our right brain being our emotional side and our left-brain being our logical side. In his new book, “The Whole Brained Child,” due out in early October, Daniel Siegel introduces the concept of the upstairs and downstairs parts of our brain. The downstairs part of our brain is with us when we are born and never leaves us. It’s the very primitive part of our brain that keeps us breathing, our heart beating, and other basic systems — the systems that we cannot control — going. It contains our survival reaction like fight or flight, or freeze. For our first 2-3 years of life, it holds our earliest type of memory — sensory memory.
Constructed throughout childhood, the upstairs part of our brain goes through a major remodel during adolescence. This is why teenagers are so illogical and impulsive; their cortex has gone “offline” for a few years. Some researchers now believe that Continue reading Emotional Regulation: The Upstairs/Downstairs Brain
By Abbie Smith, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services
Your child’s aggressive outbursts, clumsiness, inability to dress herself, or constant meltdowns may be due to a condition called Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). About 5-15% of school-aged children have it, and the rate it’s believed, is higher for internationally adopted children. It can run in families, and there is also evidence that prenatal stressors can contribute. A lack of proper stimulation in a child’s first years may also impact the brain’s ability to process sensory information.
Sensory integration is a person’s ability to automatically sort and organize the multitude of sensory messages our brain constantly receives. Continue reading Emotional Regulation: Sensory Processing Disorder
By Abbie Smith, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services
In the last issue I wrote about oxytocin — a chemical that makes up part of the human emotional regulatory system. Today, I would like to explore emotional regulation some more, specifically focusing on the concept of “time-in.” You, most likely, have all heard of “time-outs.” When a child breaks a family rule or seeks negative attention, they are sent to “time-out.” The child is separated from others, sitting in a special place until they have calmed down and can “use their words.”
As professionals and parents have become savvier to how children learn and manage their emotions, a philosophy shift has occurred in regards to how parents should respond to children who are “misbehaving” or “out of control.” This shift resulted from the convergence of several factors. One contributing factor came from the concern — by adoptive parents and professionals — that an adoptive child, who may have a history of loss, could view a “time-out” as just another separation or rejection, however short the time-out may be.
It also became apparent — as parents and professionals began to think about how children develop — that children learn emotional regulation through their relationship with Continue reading Emotional Regulation: Time In
By Abbie Smith, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services
Since the last e-newsletter, I have learned about a hormone often considered integral to self-regulation. Oxytocin has been called the anti-stress chemical, the love hormone, the soothing, healing, regenerative hormone – the human race’s “social glue.” It creates feelings of attachment and is responsible for making us feel loved and secure.
The release of this hormone is a learned response. It is not automatic, like the adrenalin that releases when we are frightened. In fact, oxytocin is the body’s natural counteraction to adrenalin. Adrenalin hypes us up to fight or flee. When we realize there is no danger, oxytocin calms us back down. However, without proper nurturing care Continue reading Oxytocin “The Bonding Hormone”
By Abbie Smith, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services
I recently received this article from 2010 Heart of the Matter Seminars. With school resuming I think this topic is very timely and hope it is helpful to those of you with school aged children. Enjoy! ~~ Abbie Smith
“Talking with Teachers” by Julie Drew
Starting a new school year can be an exciting yet stressful time for any family. Every child and parent needs time to get comfortable with a new teacher and a different set of expectations. It also takes teachers time to get to know each family’s child and to understand their unique needs and individual learning styles. In the case of the adoptive family this time of year can present even more than the typical challenges.
Children who have experienced less than optimal care in the beginning of their life often have challenges that impact their school experience. And all adoptees havea need for their school environment to be an example of positiveadoption language, and understanding. For these reasons and more adoptive families often benefit from beginning each new school year with a parent teacher conference.
As an adoptive mother and teacher I have sat on both sides of the conference table and offer the following suggestions for a successful parent/teacher chat. Continue reading Starting a New School Year
By Abbie Smith, LCSW, Director of Clinical Services
Often when asked what your first memory is you can come up with a short clip of something. It takes anywhere from 1-3 years for our brains to mature to the point of “making movies” complete with visual and sound effects, fast forward, rewind, instant replay, and most important an on/off button. What happens before that??
Our earliest memories are sensory based and are experienced as a feeling triggered by exposure to the related sensory experience. For example, a person may be exposed to a smell that causes them to feel really good. They don’t know why that certain smell always gives them warm and fuzzy feelings, but it always does. It could also be a sound, touch, taste, or visual experience that causes a positive feeling. Continue reading Our First Memories
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I usually write about issues directly connected to behavior, which relates to a child’s ability to regulate their emotions. I came across the article below and wanted to share it in its entirety with you. Ms. Elleseff’s article is full of fun activities parents can do with their children. In January, she graciously gave her verbal permission to reprint this article for Holt’s families. Enjoy!